Day 1 - Why Am I Still Single?

Your response to everyone’s favorite question: “And why are YOU still single?”

Haha. I've been asked this question several times. I remember writing a related post. I admit getting pissed at some point. But as years went by I learned to just smile and be cool with it.

I really don't know the answer. All I know is that I still wait for that moment when I can finally be with that person I am meant to be with. It is not an easy journey. It wasn't. I had moments when I thought I was with the right person. It may not be an official relationship, but it was an almost. I had my world revolve around those people. I think I might even pursued some. But in the process, I was hurt. I was afraid. I might even have rejected those who showed interest.

And now, I'm back to that moment of waiting. The difference now is that I can somehow reason with myself. I remember almost exactly a year ago, I was in an almost relationship. It didn't progress. Somehow the person had other priorities. And until now, he still has other priorities. Perhaps that's the reason. It all boils down to me wanting to be with him when he clearly doesn't want to be with me. 

I try to fight that feeling. I do. I get affected everytime I am teased. I get pissed actually. Because it brings back feelings that I have clearly haven't moved on from. And I am trying. I'm trying really hard. I am not exactly sure how I am doing it but I do try.

Back to the question om why am I still single, again I don't know. All I know is I don't want having those pity eyes on me. Those words that would tell me how in a pitiful state I am because at this age, I am still single. It's not helping. 

I pray though that there will come a time that those who tease me and pity me because I am still single, wouldn't anymore. Yes, I can reason with myself more now. But there are times that I get so vulnerable. And this is one of those times.