Happy Birthday Charlie Mark!

Hangover

I haven't been drunk in a while. I am just an occasional drinker. And I know my limit. So when I get drunk(esp on purpose), it's either I am with someone who is broken hearted or I am broken hearted. But when I chose to be drunk last Thursday, I'm neither.

I just had to get drunk. But I am never doing that again. I wasn't able to work properly the next day.

Labaddddddd.... 

Wala Lang 7

Fishes

Seven years ago
Nine young ladies in pink skirts
With youthful dreams and aspirations
Were brought together by love and friendship

Together they shared
Happy Moments
Filled with joy and laughter

There maybe moments of sadness
But these are just small
They were able to get through

One thing that sets them apart
Is the calm, easy, and happy bond they have
They do not necessarily be together
To feel each others care and love

Seven years of togetherness
Until now they continue to share
And they know in their hearts
That the promise of this togetherness
They'll forever enjoy

Byang
2 April 2004

Fishes, that's the name given by a classmate in high school to our barkada. She said it was because we were like a school of fish that cannot be separated. 

Wow, how time flies. Who would have thought that we are still friends after 17 years. I've known these people for more than half my life. Along the way, of course, we have develop other friendships. And we added new friends to the group. But then we never forget. 

Personally, there are a lot of things that I do not know anymore about them. But then again, I guess it don't matter. When we communicate, when we see each other, there is still that easy bond. And in my heart, I know that they are the people who won't judge me, who will be there for me, and will love me.

I miss them. I don't know when we will be complete again. But I know, in God's time we will be.

Rarat, Amor, Ann, Nene, Kookie, Deebhe, Olga, Queken, Pani, Byang, Tingting

ASDFGHJKL!

Wala Lang 6

My Dream, My Reality

Four years ago

I had this dream

I was soaking wet in the rain

Hiding the tears that were flowing

For a love that just couldn't be

Then a man went to me

He dried up my tears

And comforted ,e

Four years after

I didn't expect that I would see

The reality of that dream

I met a guy

In the midst of distress

He brought back what i have lost

He became my strength

I fell in love with him

A I did deeply

But friends are all we ever could be

He has someone whom he loves dearly

So in the rain I cried

Unlike the dream that ended well

My reality just did not

But I'll continue on hoping,wishing

'Til my dream be my reality

And my reality be my dream.

byang

1 Apr 2004

Wala Lang 5

IN YOU

I long have waited for a love

A love that would equal the love I have

Then one summer day you came

Looking so cute in that badminton game

It all started with a smile

Then we talked for quite a while

When it was time to say goodbye

You asked if you could always drop by

From that time on

I have never been on my own

You were always there

To share a love so dear

In you I've found what I've been waiting for

I would not want to ask for more

Byang

1 April 2004

I would not anymore expound on the subject. :)

I'd like to share though a song that I first heard of today. All of me by John Legend.  Thanks to Paolo's post. I got intrigued with the song and searched for it. Loved it in an instant. And it's currently on repeat.

Few of my fave lines:

'Cause all of me
Loves all of you
Love your curves and all your edges
All your perfect imperfections
Give your all to me
I'll give my all to you
You're my end and my beginning
Even when I lose I'm winning
'Cause I give you all of me
And you give me all of you, oh

Wala Lang 4

Ten Hours

ten hours...
   that's all i have
ten hours
   in this world
   to stay awake and be alive
ten hours
   to bid goodbye
   to those whom i truly love
ten hours
   is left for me
   to express what i truly feel
ten hours
   for me to say
   i love you my dear friend
ten hours
  may not be enough
ten hours
  may be all too late,
  but since
ten hours
  is all I have
  might as well show this love
 with what I've got
ten hours...


byang
31 March 2004

Last night I finished reading Tuesdays with Morrie. That book was wow! I never thought I'd learn a lot from someone who is about to die. Morrie was right about everything he said. Sometimes people tend to focus on the superficial that we neglect the essentials. 

Ten Hours was my answer to the "Ms Universe" question of what I'll do if I am given that much to live. But then again, reality dictates that we are unsure of when will be our last day here on earth. But then we are sure that we will die someday. So why wait for that last day? I mean, can we do on a daily basis the essential things that we want to do if it were our last day here on earth? 

Actually, I am posing that question to myself. And honestly, I don't know how to respond to it. There's a difference between knowing and actually taking action. I know what I need to do but I don't do it. I let fear and cowardice overpower me. Though I am happy to say that I may not say words of love to my parents or those I care about, I've somehow managed to have a better relationship with them. Yes, there are relationships that I need to mend. Hopefully, I'll have the courage to take action.

I am quite in a dilemma on one certain aspect. I'm in a constant push and pull between having the courage to take action and the fear of rejection. Oh well.

\

Wala Lang 3

Just Thinking

Lying on my bed, I think of you

   the sweet smell that soothes me

   the smile that thrills me

   the look that melts me

You just don't now what you do to me

 Everytime you're near

    It's as if heaven is within reach

Everytime I hear your voice

    It's as if angels are singing

Everytime I look into your eyes

    It's as if I see one great love

Yes! It is so great to feel this way

     But will I forever lie on my bed

       and just think of you?

Or will you tell me 

      that you feel the same way too?

Byang

30 March 2004

Hahahaha I must have been in love when I wrote the poems in this compilation. I can't help but laugh. 

I'm thinking of someone while writing this one. I am not sure if he is thinking of me too. I just hope. I can just imagine him talking to me. I miss his voice. I miss his smile. 

Wala Lang 2

To A Friend

I hide in this big mask

Trying to fight the feelings I have

For you who is sweet and nice

Friendship with you is far more important

So this feeling I will keep inside

I may be hurt everytime you're with her

But I'm trying my best just to stand still

The love I have for you will always be there

Everyday it grows and it grows stronger

I do have the courage to say this

If these were for someone else

But to you my friend I can't

I know that all you can give me is friendship

I long have accepted that fact

Though I am hiding in this big mask

My love for you just couldn't be denied

You may already have noticed it

Though you are just trying to ignore it

I admit that I am loving you this much

And this much I'll just forever keep inside....

Byang - 29 March 2004

It isn't a secret that I fell in love with friends. There are those that I openly told the person (risking the friendship). And there are those that I didn't. And it is no secret that these "love" caused me heartaches because they weren't reciprocated. But I am already past that. I believe that those were necessary pain for me to learn, to grow, and be ready when  my one true love comes. 

If I'll be asked why I took the risk for some  and didn't for the others. Simple, because those risks were worth taking. The people involved were worth the risk.

Say Something (I'm Giving Up on You)

Because it's a holiday and I am too lazy to go out or do chores, I just stayed in my room and watched Vampire diaries. Thanks to brad for downloading the latest episodes. I must have forgotten the last episode I saw. Or perhaps I missed an episode or two. I was surprised to know that Elena broke up with Damon. You see, I've always been a fan of their love story. It's not perfect but they always find ways to make it work (even if they are already on the verge of giving up). I would learn later on though that it wasn't really Elena who broke up with Damon. It was Katherine disguised as Elena. What is not surprising is the way Damon reacted to the break-up. He was shattered (who wouldn't be?) and went back to being the crazy person that he was before he fell in love with Elena and Elena loved her in return. Anyway, with the last episode I saw, they got back together with Elena not anymore under Katherine's influence. Their love is that strong.

I used to fantasized having that same kind of story. That being, having a love so great that it can conquer whatever obstacle there is. And I believe that I can have that someday.

Oh, why the title? It was a background song for a Delena moment. It's a sad song. And I don't know why my heart aches everytime I listen to it. It's currently on repeat.

Here's the song!

Wala Lang 1

While looking for something, I found an old compilation of poems I wrote years ago. I can't help but smile and laugh even. Was I in love when I wrote those? Or my muse just sprinkled me with lots of dust for inspiration? Anyway, I am glad that I came across those again. It reminded me of a part of me that I long have forgotten and perhaps I need to "be" again.

And so I am sharing everything. And I might add some notes on each to add a touch of the present. This could be a start of something new for me.  Pardon the grammatical errors/inconsistencies. :)

The Love I am Yet to Find

I woke up one sunny day

  Feeling bright and breezy

I smiled as I saw one handsome face

  Who's deeply asleep beside me

I kissed him on the lips

  And I touched my tummy

Oh! I can't wait to see my baby

  And be a proud mommy

I went into the kitchen

  And prepared his favorite meal

I happily set up the table

  As I wait for my husband dear

I went to wake him up

  But one thing caught me by surprise

Oh! It is my darling smiling

  Ready to give me my prize

I heard him whisper sweet nothings

  As I helped him with his tie

I love you so much

  I whispered in reply

I felt my heart jumped

  As we kissed. The he bid goodbye

Oh! He's off to work

   Can't wait for the time to pass by

I did my chores

  And went through the day

I even called up a friend

  And shared my story

I really can't explain

  The happiness I have inside

Oh! I have a wonderful husband

  And a baby soon to be alive

I don't want to open my eyes

  But the clock is so noisy it's seven o'clock

I hurriedly went to class

  Then suddenly I was taken aback

I bumped into someone

  The man I was with last night

Oh! What a sweet dream I had

  Could it be the love I am yet to find?

29 Mar 2004

To this day, I haven't found that love yet. But I am sincerely praying for someone. And that someone's face is already etched on my mind. He's a happy "place" for me now. :) 

Broken Promises and Lost Opportunities

Just so sad. So sad. :(