In my email communications lately, I seemed to have favorited a phrase; Moving Forward. It's my way of trying to divert the negative tone of each email to something positive. I never thought that answering emails can be very draining. Esp that not everyone is supportive.But what does it really mean to me? Am I truly moving forward? Am I ready to move forward? If I truly assess where I am right now, I could say that I am.
I had this wonderful conversion with my pals earlier. I openly talked about Bo's. And that's one good sign that I am truly moving forward. No bitterness anymore. I can laugh about everything already. What struck me though during our conversation, was when I admitted that I miss him. After all, we were friends. And I'd like to believe that we still are. Maybe, I pushed him away with all my kadramahan. I tried to reach out. I am reaching out. But perhaps, he moved forward a little faster than I had. Maybe, just maybe, we cannot be the way we used to be. And that is something that I cannot control. And I accept that.
To you my dear friend, if you happen to read this, I miss you. I really want to know how you are doing with everything. I hope that time will come when I can easily just strike a conversation with you without having to worry if you'd respond or without having to seem pathetic. I miss you. I miss you. I still love you, I guess that will not change. But I am not in love with you anymore.
So, moving forward...
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