Mahal

MAHAL... it's a cute endearment. And it's an endearment used by bo's and his new love. I don't know their love story. We haven't had the chance to talk about it. And i am not also sure if he is willing to share.

Why write about this all of a sudden? I was just reminded because of MMK. It's actually an episode about the process of moving on. And I actually can relate. I think I am still in the process.

Bo's went through a failed relationship which I don't know the story too. But having his mahal right now, he must have moved on already. And as a friend, i am happy for him.

And I am also looking forward to that time that I'll eventually have that new love. As I have shared in my previous posts, I recently had my heart broken. It just sinked in to me that I was sort of dumped. And in a way was played at.

I already passed the stage of being mad and being in denial. I just am not so sure at what stage I am right now. I just overshadow what I truly feel because of everything that happened with my parents.

Many would say that it should be easy to move on. I wasn't in a relationship in the first place. And there are not much memories to hold on to. And it was recently revealed that everything could have been a lie.

So why am I having a hard time? Is it because of my stubbornness? Is it because I want revenge? I am having a hard time because I trusted the person. He knew what I went through with my past heartaches. And in fairness to me, I did my best to not do those things that caused me to push people away.

I trusted him enough to not question his sincerity.

Perhaps I was blinded. Perhaps I assumed too much. Perhaps I am to be blamed too.

Hopefully, after this I can truly move forward. And I sincerely pray that the next person that I will fall in love with or develop a liking to, wilk not play with my feelings. I am too old for that already.

And just like the prayer of that girl in MMK, I pray that I'll find that someone I am meant to spend the rest of my life with. I also pray that I won't give up on loving.