Today, I registered in a weight loss challenge (WLC) contest. Though I know I would be disqualified later on because I won't be able to finish, I registered just the same. I registered just for the fun of joining. And the benefits of the lectures of course. It is also to help me with the weight loss program I have set for myself. Honestly, I am already at the verge of giving up. There's just so many things running in my head that I need food's comfort. I already want to binge. But I am really fighting that urge to give up. You see, there's more to this WLC. I know I need to lose weight but what I need to lose most is the bigger weight that I am carrying.
The other day, a college crush asked me where I am and then that conversation went to my acknowledging that I am confused on which path to follow. That in fact I am afraid to take a bigger risk. I admit I am a coward in terms of career move. I am so afraid to venture and get out of my comfort zone. I am afraid to start again. Just like it took me a long while leave teaching and venture out. This is why I stayed despite everyone leaving (talk about mass resignation.will write about it some other time).
It's not that I don't have dreams. It's not that I don't have aspirations. I do. But mine is just simple. To stay (work) here in the Philippines and just travel to places. But it's hard with my current status. That's why I really need to take on another path. This is the bigger weight I am carrying right now. And I am still not taking actions. All I have are just words.
:) All is well. Everything will take place at its own time. You will be there very soon. :)
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